Fun with Spanish words

have this friend who is taking Spanish lessons.
She decided to take sticky notes and label almost everything in her house with the Spanish equivalent of the word for that item. So all over the house there are words written in Spanish on objects.
While she wasn’t around I placed a few extra ones. For instance I labeled a lamp, some dog food, and a stereo with the correct Spanish translation.

However, I also translated a few extra things for her.

The steak in the freezer I labeled “carne de caballo”
Translation:
Horse meat

The non diary creamer in the fridge I labeled "leche materna”
Translation:
Breast milk

The remote control I labeled “el consolador”
Translation:
The dildo

“Honey whats for dinner?”
“I’m making carne de caballo”
“Mmm. Mmm. That sounds delicious.”

“Would you like some leche de materna in your coffee?”

And my favorite
“Honey I am bored. Hand me el consalador.”